On the first day of autumn, Crow and Blue Jay moved into a new nest near the top of a gorgeous oak tree. It was a humble nest in a prime location. Crow unpacked his favorite acorns, right after the couple had signed the deed, and lined them up over the mantle, stepping back and admiring them like they were his children. “Have you ever been this happy, Jay?” Crow asked. “Never,” replied Blue Jay. It was a humble nest, and that was fine. The love-struck birds needed little more than each other’s affection, which was enough to make them sing boisterously every morning (Crow was a horrible singer, but that’s another story). The couple had two comfortable chairs, a small table, plenty of orange and red leaves, a tiny pantry full of grubs and seed, and a soft pine-brush bed. This was their first nest together, and their love left them free from worry or want.

On the first day of winter, Blue Jay asked Crow if they could get a few candles so she could read at night, since the winter nights were so long and dark. Crow told her, “My love, we can’t afford candles. We have just enough money to have this home the way it is.” Blue Jay cried when she heard this, overwhelmed by the thought of her silent nights of blackness to come. Crow, feeling like a stingy old turkey, mortgaged the nest, and got a box of candles from Badger. Blue Jay was so happy!

On the first day of spring, Crow asked Blue Jay if they could get a bigger bed so he could stretch his wings out at night, since the days were getting longer and there was so much work to be done while the sun was out. Blue Jay told him, “My love, we can’t afford a new bed. We have just enough money to have this home the way it is.” Crow cried when he heard this, already aching from the thought of his poor little cramped wings. Blue Jay, feeling like a silly old dodo, re- mortgaged the nest, and got a brand new California King Cotton bed from Coyote. Crow slept like royalty!

On the first day of Summer, Blue Jay asked Crow if they could build a little bird bath on the east side of the nest, since the hot afternoons were the perfect time to take a refreshing dip and cool down. Crow told her, “My love, we can’t afford a bird bath. We have just enough money to have this home the way it is.” Blue Jay cried when she heard this, imagining how muggy and harsh her nest would feel every night. Crow, feeling like a mean old vulture, re-re-mortgaged the nest, and contracted Fox and Alligator to build the bird bath. Blue Jay was elated!

These luxurious lifestyle upgrades continued as the couple, now seemingly unable to prove their love in any other way than material generosity, transformed their humble love nest into an imposing little castle. It looked nothing like the original nest! Instead of sitting in their chairs talking the night away as they did when they first moved into the nest, Crow customarily sat in the dining room alone and smoked cigars while listening to records. Blue Jay spent her nights painting landscapes that complimented the crystal acorns that now lined the mantle. They both woke in separate rooms every morning, too gorged and groggy to sing together.

The day after Crow re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-mortgaged the nest to buy Blue Jay a marble statue of an Eagle, the Oak branch foundation snapped, sending the once humble nest plummeting to the forest floor. Everything was destroyed and the couple had no assets to settle their loans with Badger, Coyote, Fox, and Alligator (nature’s most cruel creditors). In the end, after much deliberation and bureaucracy, the birds were devoured by their creditors and a new tiny nest was built on the repaired Oak branch foundation.

True love is truly the greatest treasure of them all.